A Birthday Pause
Serendipitously, the day before my 30th birthday, I narrowed down my core desired feelings (a la the Desire Map) in a radical way. I am the person to whom the idea of narrowing down anything is both an alluring and painstaking process. I love possibilities, and thrill and thrive when I look out onto an array of gorgeous and luscious and inviting options… whether in activities, food choices, travel destinations or books to dive into. But the thrill of anticipation can very swiftly and easily turn into scatter-brained madness if I attempt to pursue ALL of those options at once. ((Which is not as much of an exaggeration as it may seem, as I have been known to, on occasion, even order more than one entree at a time))
One of my endeavors over the past couple years, has been a practice in discernment. An bold look and gentle honesty with what aligns with what I truly value, and what I truly desire. It’s a slowly evolving process, one step forward, a couple slide steps back.
One would think that limiting possibilities would feel… well… limiting.
That idea kept me cycling for a long time ((and lets be real, often, it still does)). But if I could just convey… the utter freedom that comes with honing in on what you actually desire. …the ability it brings to simmer in a moment, to savor every delectable bite or breath or word or movement. …the intoxication that can occur when you devote yourself, rather than dip and flit amongst the surfaces of many. …how you can be filled up and turned inside out with the deliciousness of such daring simplicity.
Oh, yes. It’s that good.
And these are the things that I want for my life.
:: to feel Freedom with every breathe
:: Devotion with every choice
:: to feel Filled up by life, as much as humanly possible.
This is the way I want to feel. And I suspect that at least part of the key lies in that gentle honesty and daring simplicity.
PS. Thank you for all the birthday wishes, loves <3